In the Details

It’s in the details that I exist.
It’s in good morning, did you sleep ok?
Come on girls, its time to wake up,
Flipping on the hall light
Shuffling down the stairs
To start coffee.
It’s in that first morning prayer,
God, make this a good day.
It’s in sleepy morning grumpy faces,
I don’t want to go to school,
Warm cheek kiss
And messy hair, sour breath.
It’s in I can’t find my khakis,
We need lunch money,
Shower and dressing,
Now it’s time to rush,
Come on, we’ll be late
And mommy, hold you, hold you
Arms outstretched
Of the little one who can’t understand hurry.
Its have a good day, I love you,
See you after school,
Then sweet babysitter home
Warm morning smells
And good-bye to the little one
Clinging tight.
Its in changing gears now
To my other world
Of folders and families
And phone calls
And lots and lots of people
With stories like mine,
Yet different.
It’s driving,
Always driving
To get it all done
To get to the end of the list for today
Only to realize how much I forgot.
It’s picking up kids
And picking up the house,
Wiping away tears
And wiping dried cereal off the table.
What’s for dinner,
Throw in a load,
I’ve got homework,
Can you help?
I want a drink,
I’m starving,
We’ll eat soon, no more cookies,
Will you read me a story?
And sometimes,
An unsolicited hug from a child.
I love you,
How was your day?
You’re growing up too fast,
You can’t be my baby,
You’re as tall as I am.
Pass the potatoes,
Who has the dishes?
Switch a load,
When will I fold it?
A phone call, my friend’s voice
That feels like the sunrise
Are you busy?
Let’s get together soon.
It’s bath time and
Did you brush your teeth?
These floors sure need sweeping.
Did you finish your homework?
Did you finish your room?
Asking these questions
But wondering inside
Are you happy?
Are you healthy?
Am I doing enough?
Can we read, Mom?
That sounds great
As soon as I’m finished…
It’s sweet dreams,
I love you.
Is this the way it’s supposed to be?
It’s reading time, writing time
Quiet on the couch.
God, thank you and help me,
Till my eyes won’t stay open.
I crawl into bed,
My husband’s warm breathing,
I love you, I miss you, I need you,
Good-night.

By Maria Brady-Smith, circa 1996
Photo by Mike Smith